Category: Weird Articles
Published on Wednesday, 26 November 2014 00:00
Humans tend to get so caught up playing God that they don't know when to stop even when they have gone too far. Somehow when the project goes horribly wrong and the animal ends up looking like a creature from hell, they still think to themselves, “I am awesome for creating such a magnificent creature. I am God now, and I shall create more of these majestic abominations.” Seriously, I feel sorry for these animals that were conceived by human hands, their faces just seem to scream, “Kill me now.” Check out these 7 animal abominations that humans have unleashed upon this world.
1. Damascene Goat
Where is the rest of this poor goat's face?! It looks like someone took a machete to the goat's snout and chopped it off because having a full snout is too mainstream. This particular species of goat is the result of many many dedicated years of carefully regulated breeding. It is said that the concept of beauty differs from culture to culture, and this is indeed true considering the fact that a Damascene goat won the title of most beautiful goat at a competition in Saudi Arabia. Damascene goats are primarily raised for their milk and have been around for centuries, making frequent appearances in Arabic literature and folklore, in which they are praised for their “special character, striking characteristics, and nobility.” Yep, that's the real face of nobility all right, all credited to humans and their over-zealous desire of tinkering with genetic manipulation.
2. Meishan Pig
The Meishan pig hails from China and was created through selective breeding of Taihu pigs. It was then brought over to America through a collaborative effort between the University of Illinois, Iowa State University and the USDA. Why? Well for eating of course! The two universities and the U.S. Department of Agriculture thought that it would be a great idea to introduce Meishan pigs to America because they reach sexual maturity really early, and have a long reproductive lifespan with a large litter size of up to 16 piglets. More pigs mean more bacon for the 'Muricans. However, Meishan pork didn't really sell as well as farmers thought they would because shockingly, even by American standards, the meant is too fatty. You know shit just got serious with how far humans took to mutating this animal when even the Americans refuse to eat it for being too fatty. The Meishan pigs stubbornly produce excessive amounts of body fat as they grow older without showing any signs of slowing down to the point that many of them are partially blind from the fats hanging over their eyes.
3. Werewolf Cat
The Lykoi was specially created by someone who thought that there would be a market out there for people who want to own a cat infused with a diseased vampire bat. The Lykoi has a sparse, patchy and prickly coat due to a rare genetic anomaly that for some reason, humans thought it would be great to develop on. The gene variant responsible for its mangy coat affects the cats' hair follicles, leaving them unable to produce and/or maintain the soft fur that cats usually possess. Fortunately these cats do not suffer from any adverse health effects so far as compared to other animals that humans genetically mutate, though geneticists and veterinarians warm the potential problems might arise when the cats are 6 or 7 years old.
4. Gibber Italicus Canary
Canaries are well loved for their bright and colorful plumage, and their sweet and melodious chirps. But what possessed Italian canary enthusiasts to create this scrawny, vulture-like canary is way beyond my comprehension. Looking like it is suffering from a spinal deformity, this canary is basically the crackhead of the avian kingdom, constantly twitching around as if in agony of its appearance. These canaries have been closely inbred and their plumage is best described as scanty.
5. Poitou Donkey
These donkeys with their grimy dreadlocks have been around since the early 1700s. Despite possessing hobo-like hair, they have always been highly prized for their hard-working nature. What you lack in looks, you got to make up in other aspects I suppose. In 1977, a survey found that there were only a few Poitous left on Earth, so concerned donkey lovers who were probably not aware that these donkeys were man made, decided to go against Mother Nature and created a “studbook”, where “breeding liaisons could be arranged”, basicially a club for donkeys to have one-night stands. Today there are around 1,000 of these Rastafarian donkeys around earnestly slaving for their human masters.
6. Skinny Pig
A skinny pig is a type of guinea pig that has had most of its fur bred off them, leaving little but wrinkly, rubbery skin. The skinny pig is not completely hairless though, they usually have tufts of hair on their faces, feet and legs. This breed originated from a mutation that occurred in a laboratory, and guinea pig lovers somehow got a hold of these experiments gone wrong and started cross breeding them so that they could, in my expert opinion, pair the gentle, playful personality of a guinea pig with the glory of a hairy ball sack.
7. Budapest Pigeon
Most chicks look like horrifying, scraggly testicles with eyes when they first break out of their eggshells, it's only when they reach adulthood that their beauty really emerges. But the Budapest pigeon will never experience the Ugly Duckling end result as it takes its ugliness from young all the way into adulthood. These frog-eyed birds were created in the early 1900s by the Poltl brothers of Hungary. They are so deformed that there is hardly any chance of the babies surviving solely in the care of their mothers, and they require hand-feeding from human carers to survive till adulthood. In case it is not obvious enough, their deformities include their head being made out of 80 percent eyeball. Strangely though, budapest pigeons are great fliers, able to stay in the air for up to five hours at a time and reach great heights. They probably pushed themselves to go where hardly any birds will go so to avoid the screams of horror and judgmental remarks by other birds.
It took Mother Nature hundreds of millions of years of evolution to fill the Earth with some of the most beautiful and fascinating animals fully capable of surviving on their own out in the wild. Then mankind came and ran millenniums worth of natural creation down to the ground with one fell swoop, creating horribly mutated animals that are completely incapable of surviving without the proper care of man. Just leave the creation of life to Mother Nature please.